The very first glance of him changed my world.
When he was a baby I used to wonder how it would feel to see him walking and waited impatiently to see those small feet set its first steps. Even when I saw other kids running I would say to myself ” just a few more months ” and he will also be out there running!
Now he is in third standard and I wonder where all those years have gone.
As a baby he was smart , friendly and intelligent. But somehow he was different from others even though we couldn’t tell what was it.
He is very intelligent but he is not like other kids. That was what always confused us. He would struggle with the most simplest things. His memory is , well, I don’t know what to say. I just rely on him without any doubt. He will align anything simply looking at the pictures in the manual . How he could see it fully in his mind I always wonder.
He always found it difficult to strike a friendship especially with kids of his age. But I have found him immensely enjoying with kids smaller than him.
He became very moody once he started to go to school.The problems seemed to increase when we would scold him for that. Teachers always complained about him for being very sensitive.
The real problem started when the spelling lessons began. He wrote every thing upside down in mirror writing. jumbled the spellings. And would not read anything if he could help it . Lost umpteen number of pencils, and rubbers, scales and umbrellas . Never completed his notes. Would never remember his home works or assignments.
And I always thought it was his laziness. I will never be able to forgive myself for those times.
I recognized that he is a child with learning differences only after seeing the movie ” Tare zameen par”. Thanks to Ameer and his crew for the effort they have taken. ( I was a hard core Ameer fan even from my school days, but never thought that he would give a message that will change my child’s life.)
I identified this on the verge of losing him. We had almost forgot how he laughed and he had become very stubborn . For the first time we realized, it was his helplessness that we thought as stubbornness.
It was the most shocking experience that happened in my life. After that I made a promise to myself that I will help him get through and will always be there for him .
Thanks to all the guidance on net.
At first he would not speak of his class or school or anything personal. The mental pain I had inflicted trying to make him perfect was more than I could imagine.
But I wouldn’t give up. I kept on asking him about every silly thing I had always taken for granted. I Hugged him , kissed him . Every day I would tell him, ” We love You!”
We started to work on his strengths. Elocution, drawing, building blocks, puzzles , computer , school projects and so on…
Slowly, very slowly he began to respond. He began to respond to our love, care , support and patience.
The Evening sky
When he lost his things I said to myself that my son is more precious to me than all those silly things. Instead I gave him a check list and a smiley to make him remember that we love him for what he is , and nothing , absolutely nothing would ever change it.
And believe me, slowly the child who used to lose all his things , who could never complete his class works and could only be found crying, slid into the back of our memory and a sweet boy who is very understanding , most lovable and confident of his strengths evolved . It took more than a year.
Now we learn every thing in our own way. I don’t have to teach him the portions taught at school as he knows them better than me. But I teach him how to write them correctly for exams.
For maths I send him to Abacus classes and now he has improved a lot . When I think of the 1st and 2nd std boy who was so much teased for his slow writing he has gained so much .
My special thanks to his Abacus Trainer Ms. Priya. . She gave him confidence, support and company. Even then, I don’t know what will happen in the next term as it covers multiplication and division and he hasn’t reached that level for Abacus.
Thanks to his 2nd standard English teacher Ms Anitha who somehow did the magic and made him read books. He has become a voracious reader. Reads anything he could lay his hands on. Reads beautiful bed time stories to his little sister.
( One thing about Dyslexia is it cannot be handled by a single individual . It needs the support of the family and society or anybody who comes in contact with the child. As these children are very observant they can sense even the slightest change in your facial expression . So you have to be alert almost always.)
Now he is the captain of his team . I help him with every work he has to do even if it is some what out of the way. He has his own ideas of doing his projects. And believe me, the results are amazing.
One day we were making a chart on Delhi and casually my son told me ” Mother, Now I have so many friends . I don’t know why.” It was his way of saying that he was very happy with it . It took some time for the words to sink in.
It were the most beautiful words he has ever told me. Just like some body had said, it may be a small step for his friends but a great leap for my son who had spent most of his time in school alone. Now, he goes to school with his cricket bat and ball and sometimes with his precious red football his Uncle had presented him.
I am happy that our love and care has brought back smile on his face.
Even now sometimes he drive me out of my limits. Has difficulty in making and writing sentences. Now also he lose his things once in a while , gets bullied by his class mates or van mates now and then, may not complete his work or may became frustrated when things doesn’t go his way.
But after a while he realizes that he can get through . And we know the hard work he puts to adjust with his exceptions and that makes all the difference.
Today when I walk with him holding his hands there is hope ! Hope of a future not so far away when those small hands will be big and strong enough to hold me !
Note : I write this for all those parents out there who don’t realize the turmoil their child is going through . To those who don’t realize the effort your child puts to keep up with your standards. All they want You is to accept them.
Realize it !
Set down your standards a little bit. Let your child smile, laugh and play! Let them do what they love to and let them not be afraid to wake up in the morning worrying what awaits them today at school and at home!
Make this world a better place for him/her to live.And it is never too late!