Category Archives: Parenting and Child driven learning

The book I like most – Peter Pan (3rd Grade )

For some time I have been thinking of posting the speeches and stories we have prepared for various programs at school over the years .  Here is a sample speech for ‘The book I like most ” . Ruby won second prize for this when he was in 3rd grade .

image courtesy- Google search

Respected Teachers and my dear friends,

I have been reading Peter Pan again and again. I love it so much that I thought today I will share it with you all .

This beautiful book take us to a magical world where nobody ever grow old. Neverland ! Peter pan and Tinker Bell live there . And not so far away , in London live three little children who loves to hear Peter Pan’s stories at bed time. Adventurous stories of Indians and pirates . Wow ! Like John , Wendy and Micheal Darling I too go to bed reading beautiful bed time stories.

My most favourite part in the book is Peter pan losing his shadow and Wendy sewing it back . Will anybody lose their shadow and can they just sew it back ? I always wonder !

I cannot wait to sprinkle some pixie powder on me and fly to Neverland along with them. Golden rainbows, blue waterfalls and springing mermaids. It is all magic and thrill.

Then there is the Evil Captain Hook who kidnaps the Indian Chief’s daughter Tiger Lilly . Peter Pan and Pixie save her adventurously. Peter Pan’s fierce duel with Captian Hook is thrilling . I always laugh reading Captain hook being chased by the crocodiles.

The magical journey on the Pirate ship through the night sky back to London. No child will ever forget Peter Pan.

It is surely the book I like most ! Thank You .

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An album of your favourite personality – J K Rowling

Book of the week

This week we have been reading ‘ The world of Peter rabbit and friends ‘ by Beatrix Potter .

The book was sitting idle in our library for almost two years . The date written on the book shows we bought it on Pearl’s 5th birthday . As usual Ruby read it for once and discarded it . I had tried to read it to Pearl quite a few times before and then dropped. She was too restless to listen . She likes stories of princesses and fairies . A typical pinky girl 😀 Now that she has started reading on her own and can understand what is being read she is digging out all the old books from our library . And I am loving it 🙂

What attracts me to the book is the beautiful paintings . Peter is a naughty little rabbit and the stories in the series revolve around Peter rabbit and his friends and neighbours .

The stories of animals in Balarama and Poombatta were always my favorite . What a pity I did not come across Potter’s books when I was a child myself . I simply love her way of writing and her illustrations . Its a joy to read how animals spend their day . hehe 😀 😀 you are correct 😀 More than the kids I am the one who enjoys all these children’s books.

Now we have a collection of her books . I cannot stop myself whenever I come across a Beatrix Potter  book . Lately kids have started to haul me away 😦

Enjoy ! A good read with lots of plots to keep little minds engaged .

Clay Modelling

I think it is the season for clay modelling and Harry Potter .  Yesterday Ruby made some excellent clay models that I was forced to pull out the long forgotten Canon from the depths of my bag 😛

When he is not making clay models he is reading Harry Potter . And Pearl is busy with all her activities .  My favourite is her girly stories with loads of pictures in it .

Books

To mark the last leg of vacation we made another visit to the used – books – store Blossoms at Convent Junction .

Ruby now spends most of his time with his nose buried in Secret Seven . As I am lazy and forgetful when  it comes to routine I have asked Pearl to remind me to read to her one book every day . This has been going on for almost a month now and I am happy about it .

As any other parent I too find it tricky to select books for the kids . What are the guidelines you follow ? Please share 🙂

Playing dough

Yesterday night itself we decided it is going to be a ‘Play- dough ‘ day tomorrow.  In the morning , somehow it turned out  Ruby and Pearl would do a guest post for me .They didn’t do much writing or typing actually . But they came up with a great clay model . They take it from here 🙂

My sister and I love to play with dough. We make flowers,mushrooms, diagrams and animals.When we went for summer camp they showed us how to make dough.Today we are making a scenery.It has a horse ,boat and a mushroom.

They outdo me when it comes to ideas and making models . So I just sit with them and enjoy their work . Clay has been a great help in bringing out  Ruby’s ideas.  They didn’t right away start making super- duper clay models . A great deal of clay has been lost in that journey . All Colours  got  mixed  up and  there was always a lot of mess . One fine day they started to make  nice models  and I don’t know when this transition really occured . Now they keep it  separate in their respective boxes after use and don’t mix up colours . Here are some other clay models done by them .

Butterfly mask

Snail garden

And this is an interesting link about clay and children .

Why do we yell at our kids ?

A few weeks back Shail Mohan shared some thoughts on her blog as a reply to one of my comments .

@Krishnaleela,

If we recognize our own confusion and fear as an adult, we will stop shouting at children for things beyond their control. The screaming and shouting can be kept as last resort instruments for more productive purposes, when they disobey our just demands for example. Don’t you think so??
But sadly most parents I have found shout when they are scared and confused. What signal does that send to the child??!

I was thinking about it for a while and delaying my response as it is one of the biggest problems confronted by young parents like me.I am noting down the random thoughts that crossed my mind .

Just take a look around you. Every where you will see parents yelling at kids as though they have done some fatal crime . Just now I saw a parent haul her son brutally after yelling at him  . This was just for sitting on the dust in the parapet . Yes , there was some dust there . I too agree. But I don’t think it needs that much attention and show off . Whatever signal she wants to send her child she is sending a message of supremacy to others who happen to sit there 😛

As Shail wondered what signal do we send our children by yelling at them? I gather the child thinks he / she has gone terribly wrong . Or that they are always wrong . And are not loved . In a way we are telling them we have more important things  . By doing that we are also closing the door of communication . The only door open to us parents to reach our kids once they venture into the real world far away from our protective wings . Mind you , this magical door is kept open to parents only in this magical young age . Soon the door will be crowded with strange looking friends and macho heroes that you will not even get a space to peep in to see what is going on inside there. Make the best of it while you can .

By screaming and shouting we are also putting the child in an equally confused state and taking away the safety feeling and confidence. After an outburst have you ever asked your child what he/she understood ? Just try it next time and you will get the most funniest answers. Most of the time the child doesn’t even understand what they are scolded for. The very thing that you wanted to convey is lost in the uproar.

The yelling comes from the fear that your child, the fruit of all your efforts , the prodigy who is going to gain you all the credits for being a super parent may do some thing wrong.  Instead of thinking that the child is just being a six-seven year old we take the short comings as our own failure in parenting and is eager to cover it up. Just like Shail noted , one of the grave aftermath of yelling , screaming and shouting is the fact that we are left with no arms and ammunition for the future when we are more likely to deal with serious problems other than jumping on the bed or playing ahead of sleep time.

As they say , the problem with parenting is it doesn’t come along with a manual . And your child is same as the surprise Kinder Joy you buy for them . You don’t know what is inside . No body tells you before hand what is right and what is wrong for your child . Trial and error is the only option.

It would have been great if there were some arrangements to train the expecting parents on the psychology of kids , different types of kids and the expected emotional behaviour at different stages and so on.

Some thing I have observed with great interest is parents , especially mothers are always eager to advice other young parents. I think this happens because they learn what is right and what is wrong only after bringing up their child  🙂

Grand parents could have done a great deal of help. But like most of the mothers reading this would accept it , we are not ready to take advice from our mother-in -laws or even mothers when it comes to bringing up our child . I think this happens because in our mind apart from the all the positive thoughts we have about our parents , we know what went wrong when they brought us up . And we don’t want that to happen to our child. So we try in every way to correct and compensate for it and end up doing some thing wrong in some other aspect. And the cycle continues.

One thing that I hate in a new born baby’s room is the hot discussion that goes on and on between mother’s family and father’s family about the right way of bringing up kids . And most of the times I see the mother’s family has to mutely accept what the father’s family says. I wonder why people cannot understand there are different ways of bringing up newborns  and each style is unique to the region.

I see that I digressed. It is such a hot topic 😉 Coming back to yelling,  I admit I have also done it many times . My son had had a real tough time while I was expecting my second born . And even after child birth . There were many people to help me but no one who can be ‘me’ even for some time. I was confused and scared . I was afraid if I would be able to do a good job bringing up both the kids . I took it out on the most vulnerable person around me . That was my son and I reaped the rewards.

Now I have deliberately controlled this misbehavior to a great extend . When my kids drive me crazy I tell them straight what is upsetting me. I suggest them ways to modify their behaviour. I explain to them situations . Quote examples to show what is right and what is wrong. Tell them stories from epics , movies etc. I give them chances . I tell them that it is not a pass or fail situation . They can always improve. And that they always have a next chance .

Here are some tips or points to ponder .

1. While you are with your child try to keep your anger on hold . ( yes, it is possible.)

2. If the issue in hand is not going to affect the child’s future go easy on it .

3. Hold the child and  give a two minutes ‘ silence time’ before you speak. This will help you to get the child’s attention and give you time to gather your thoughts .

4. Take the time and patience to explain to your child what is wrong . And also make it clear it is the action that is wrong and not the doer .

5. Please don’t make statements like ‘the child is the one who is causing all the problems in my life ‘ . ( I ‘ve heard it many times from several parents ! )

6. Please don’t tell you are taking the major decisions in your life because of / for the benifit of your child. You are the one entitled to your life. And your child is entitled only to his /her . Please don’t burden them with the weight of your decisions .

Let them grow light- hearted . And let us make them ready to take on the world when the time comes .

Pleas share your thoughts !