Back to square one !


Every thing I had thought during the holidays have been proved wrong .

Ruby has improved a lot . But I had forgotent that LD is incurable. ( Of course it is not a disease . But as it has been said the disabilities will mask the giftedness and giftedness will mask the disability leaving every body to wonder and frown why this boy is acting differently . )

During the holidays we followed ‘hands on ‘ learning . ( I will save another post for it ) . I didn’t nag him for spellings .

But now the classes have started we are back to square one .

His friends are all in other classes as some shuffling was done .  And all my parent network has been broken .I cannot show it out and upset my child . I cannot endorse it that we are in the same boat.

Today he forgot to take the vacation work and tomorrow he has to take an apology letter to school.

I  almost shouted at him for forgetting the worksheet. I was mad thinking that he messed it up in the first class itself . I want him to be in teacher’s good list as I need lot of support from her . ( It is not just that he forgot the worksheet , He is so helpless that one  find it irritating . Why can’t he a be fourth grader ? The conventional Mom in me keep on asking! )

In between he told me the other boy in his class who was also taking resource help has failed and is in third std itself .

My heart goes out for that boy.

Slowly it dawned on me all the tough times we had . How he used to mess up with his home works . How he forgot every thing  . How we have walked together and fought our way out …….

I remembered that I should not expect him to be perfect .  More important I remembered that we should stick together .

New teachers , new friends , new words , new works ….

Ruby is writing every thing jumbled.

‘It will take some time ‘ . I repeat every time I see his book . It will all take some time !

I know this is not one of my great posts . I am feeling so low. I did some back to back reading to console myself and found a comment reply I wrote to my brother in this blog .

He also has the same problem . Dyslexia.  I am posting the letter here .

Dear brother ,

My heart always go out for you whenever I see Ruby struggling . But then we were not enlightened enough .

A few days before I met a parent who has a boy almost of your age . When he talked , I could feel the suffering and helplessness he had felt all through the years. The school had always complained and complained . Even though the parents knew their child was bright, nothing could be done to prove it. It affected the child’s confidence and every thing. They eventually changed the school as he couldn’t take any more open houses .

( Because then LD wasn’t researched like this. Parents didn’t really know what should be done. The school authorities knew even less. )

But they some how got through .The child is  now well educated and well posted. The parent has taken it upon him and is now active in spreading the awareness on dyslexia.

Our mother was also with me. Afterwards she told me , “Without even knowing anything about all this I am glad I have given my son the right support .”

Yes. Now I can see clearly Unni. It was Amma’s unwavering support for you , No matter what any body else told , it was that shaped your life . It was that what saved you.

But Then , I couldn’t understand why she was always so lenient and pampering when it came to you ( absolutely out of place for your age when Sali and I were on our own even from a much younger age ). I couldn’t understand why they were so contend with your ways and never bothered about your marks. I couldn’t understand why she had always believed in you even when we all thought you needed so much improving. I thought she will spoil you . It took me so many years to realise it is the other way round. That You needed all the support and love and care to survive.

And that turned out to be correct stand. That is what every body discovered after all these research. I learned it the hard way though. Hats off to them!

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2 responses to “Back to square one !

  1. y i feel my cheeks wet after reading ur post!!!!
    i used to wonder y he cudn follow any languages tht we both cud read balarama n all at younger age n he cudn …but lovely he excelled in maths n indeed scored well through out..love u amma .bcoz of u my bro is what he is now…he has name,fame and a happy life…

  2. hmmm… seriously!!! but I actually got the support all four of you… and as you told amma gave me a lot of support .. when ever i went for an exam it was you ppl who gave me the confidence… i never have that confidence in myself… I dont know, i used to sit and think how other ppl can even say what their score will be just after the exam…. other was touching appa and amma’s feet before going for anything.. that gave me confidence.. I feel i try to find something that can increase my confidence…

    Siva has really improved a lot akka… more than you i can figure out that bcos I am seeing him after a gap right… I can see the difference… hats off to you…. I was stunned to see him reading harry potter… at that age i din know wat a novel is :D…

    Now, watever I am … its all because of you 4… Otherwise i dont know wer i would have been… luv you guys a lot.. and miss you so much….
    I miss my babies also so much!!!

    tc,
    Unni

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